In 2010, I dragged my youngest to Washington (state) NVC Family Camp. My child had a lot of reluctance, but they did come and have been going back year after year. The experiences we had transformed the way we communicated with ourselves, with each other, and with the other members of our family.
Due to COVID, there hasn’t been a WA NVC Family Camp for the past three years. My youngest became a member of the camp hosting team. Last week was the rebirth of WA NVC Family Camp. As a friend shared with me, we have come full circle.
I was amazed at the presence the parents had with their children at this camp. Some parents were eager for their children to participate in camp activities, and their children did not want to. The parents chose not to create a potential conflict out of this situation.
I saw these parents living the two questions Marshall Rosenberg (creator of Nonviolent Communication aka Compassionate Communication) posed:
- “What do I want this person to do that’s different from what he or she is currently doing?”
- “What do I want this person’s reasons to be for doing what I’m asking?”
These parents were able to step back and give their children the space to make their own choices. This took a lot of acceptance and letting go of what they, as a parent, thought would be good for their child. Their action was saying to their child “I trust you know what is best for you.”
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