When I was in high school, my friend’s sister said she had no regrets. I sensed this statement could not be true (at least for me) and couldn’t quite put my finger on why.
About six months ago, a colleague introduced me to “The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward” by Daniel Pink. In his book, Pink introduces the four pillars of regret: foundation regret, boldness regret, moral regret, and connection regret.
“Foundation regrets are small choices we make early in life that accumulate to negative consequences later in life,” says Pink. For me, foundation regret is the hardest regret to come to terms with because it is time sensitive. Time is a precious resource we can never get back.
I wished I had not studied Computer Science in college but had studied psychology instead. Yes, I can go back to school and get a degree in psychology. However, the career trajectory will be very different for a 20 or 30 something year old than for someone who is entering her retirement years. What I learned from my younger years is that I am tough and resilient. It was super hard for me to complete a Math/Computer Science degree. This experience gave me the strength to set out on my path as a Parent & Teen Coach.
Most of us will experience regret in our lives because we are only human. We can be debilitated by it or we can learn something valuable from it – accept we cannot change the past, but have the power to carve out the future we want.
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